Records of a Girlhood

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Verily \"all is vanity!\""},{"id":"content21:441","kind":"paragraph","text":"[My friend, Lord Ellesmere, purchased the series of drawings Mr. Hayter made from my performance of Juliet; and on my last visit to Lady Ellesmere at Hatchford, she pointed them out to me round a small hall that led to her private sitting-room, over the writing-table of which hung a miniature of me copied from a drawing of Mrs. Jameson's by that charming and clever woman, Miss Emily Eden.]"},{"id":"content21:442","kind":"paragraph","text":"You will be sorry for me and for many when I tell you that our good, dear friend Dall is dangerously ill. I am writing at this moment by her bed.... This is the only trial of the kind I have ever undergone; God has hitherto been pleased to spare all those whom I love, and to grant them the enjoyment of strength and health. This is my first lonely watching by a sick-bed, and I feel deeply the sadness and awfulness of the office.... Now that I am beginning to know what care and sorrow really are, I look back upon my past life and see what reason I have to be thankful for the few and light trials with which I have been visited. My poor dear aunt's illness is giving us a professional respite, for which my faculties, physical and mental, are very grateful. They needed it sorely; I was almost worn out with work, and latterly with anxiety and bitter distress."},{"id":"content21:443","kind":"paragraph","text":"We terminated our last engagement here on Friday last, when the phlegmatic Bostonians seemed almost beside themselves with excitement and enthusiasm: they shouted at us, they cheered us, they crowned me with roses. Conceive, if you can, the shocking contrast between all this and the silent sick-room, to which I went straight from the stage...."},{"id":"content21:444","kind":"paragraph","text":"Surely, our profession involves more intolerable discords between the real human beings who exercise it and their unreal vocation, than any in the world! … In returning to England, two advantages, which I shall value much, will be obtained: a fortnight's rest during the passage, and, I hope, not quite such hard work when I resume my labors.... As for the hollowness and heartlessness of the world, by which one means really the people that one has to do with in it, I cannot say that I trouble my mind much about it. In their relations with me I commit every one to their own conscience; if they deal ill by me, they deal worse by themselves.... I hope you may be in London when we reach it. Farewell."},{"id":"content21:445","kind":"paragraph","text":"I am ever yours truly,"},{"id":"content21:446","kind":"paragraph","text":"Fanny Kemble."},{"id":"content21:447","kind":"paragraph","text":"New York, Thursday, April 24, 1834."},{"id":"content21:448","kind":"paragraph","text":"My dear H–,"},{"id":"content21:449","kind":"paragraph","text":"This will be but a short letter, the first short one you will have received from me since we parted. Dear Dall has gone from us. She is dead; she died in my arms, and I closed her eyes.... I cannot attempt to speak of this now, I will give you all details in my next letter. It has been a dreadful shock, though it was not unexpected; but there is no preparation for the sense of desolation which oppresses me, and which is beyond words.... I wrote you a long letter a few days ago, which will perhaps have led you to anticipate this. We shall probably be in England on the 10th of July.... The sole care of my father, who is deeply afflicted, and charge of everything, devolves entirely on me now.... We left Boston on Tuesday.... I act here to-night for the first time since I lost that dear and devoted friend, who was ever near at hand to think of everything for me, to care for me in every way. I have almost cried my eyes out daily for the last three months; but that is over now. I am working again, and go about my work feeling stunned and bewildered...."},{"id":"content21:450","kind":"paragraph","text":"I saw Dr. Channing on Monday; he has just lost a dear and intimate connection. With what absolute faith he spoke of her! Gone! to the Author of all good. That which was good must return to Him. It is true, and I believe it, and know it; but at first I was lost.... God bless you, dear H–. We shall meet erelong, and in the midst of great sorrow that will be a great joy to"},{"id":"content21:451","kind":"paragraph","text":"Yours ever affectionately,"},{"id":"content21:452","kind":"paragraph","text":"F. A. K."},{"id":"content21:453","kind":"paragraph","text":"We have buried dear Dall in a lonely, lovely place in Mount Orban's Cemetery, where – and I used to go and sit together last spring, in the early time of our intimacy. I wished her to lie there, for life and love and youth and death have their trysting-place at the grave."},{"id":"content21:454","kind":"paragraph","text":"My aunt died in consequence of an injury to the spine, received by the overturning of our carriage in our summer tour to Niagara."},{"id":"content22:0","kind":"paragraph","text":"I was married in Philadelphia on the 7th of June, 1834, to Mr. Pierce Butler, of that city."}],"toc":[{"id":"content0:0:1","label":"Fanny Kemble Records of a Girlhood","page":1,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv#reader-content"},{"id":"content0:1:1","label":"PREFATORY NOTE","page":1,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv#reader-content"},{"id":"content0:3:1","label":"CHAPTER I","page":1,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv#reader-content"},{"id":"content1:0:9","label":"CHAPTER II","page":9,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=9#reader-content"},{"id":"content1:31:14","label":"SONG OF THE SPIRIT OF MORN","page":14,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=14#reader-content"},{"id":"content2:0:16","label":"CHAPTER III","page":16,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=16#reader-content"},{"id":"content2:35:20","label":"LE TROUBADOUR","page":20,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=20#reader-content"},{"id":"content2:38:20","label":"LE CHEVALIER ERRANT","page":20,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=20#reader-content"},{"id":"content3:0:23","label":"CHAPTER IV","page":23,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=23#reader-content"},{"id":"content4:0:30","label":"CHAPTER V","page":30,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=30#reader-content"},{"id":"content5:0:36","label":"CHAPTER VI","page":36,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=36#reader-content"},{"id":"content6:0:43","label":"CHAPTER VII","page":43,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=43#reader-content"},{"id":"content7:0:48","label":"CHAPTER VIII","page":48,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=48#reader-content"},{"id":"content8:0:55","label":"CHAPTER IX","page":55,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=55#reader-content"},{"id":"content9:0:61","label":"CHAPTER X","page":61,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=61#reader-content"},{"id":"content10:0:68","label":"CHAPTER XI","page":68,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=68#reader-content"},{"id":"content11:0:77","label":"CHAPTER XII","page":77,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=77#reader-content"},{"id":"content12:0:84","label":"CHAPTER XIII","page":84,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=84#reader-content"},{"id":"content13:0:93","label":"CHAPTER XIV","page":93,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=93#reader-content"},{"id":"content14:0:99","label":"CHAPTER XV","page":99,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=99#reader-content"},{"id":"content15:0:105","label":"CHAPTER XVI","page":105,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=105#reader-content"},{"id":"content16:0:111","label":"CHAPTER XVII","page":111,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=111#reader-content"},{"id":"content17:0:116","label":"CHAPTER XVIII","page":116,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=116#reader-content"},{"id":"content18:0:122","label":"CHAPTER XIX","page":122,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=122#reader-content"},{"id":"content19:0:130","label":"CHAPTER XX","page":130,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=130#reader-content"},{"id":"content20:0:137","label":"CHAPTER XXI","page":137,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=137#reader-content"},{"id":"content20:56:142","label":"JOURNAL, 1831","page":142,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=142#reader-content"},{"id":"content21:13:176","label":"A NEW YEAR, 1832","page":176,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=176#reader-content"},{"id":"content21:225:197","label":"Part of Letter to Mrs. Jameson","page":197,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=197#reader-content"},{"id":"content21:330:204","label":"To Mrs. Jameson","page":204,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=204#reader-content"},{"id":"content21:400:210","label":"To Miss Fitzhugh","page":210,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=210#reader-content"},{"id":"content21:428:212","label":"To Mrs. Jameson","page":212,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=212#reader-content"},{"id":"content22:1:214","label":"THE END","page":214,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=214#reader-content"},{"id":"contentnotes0:0:214","label":"1","page":214,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=214#reader-content"},{"id":"contentnotes0:3:214","label":"2","page":214,"pageUrl":"/books/2BwKrAwv?page=214#reader-content"}]},"similarBooks":[{"idCatalog":787516,"shortId":"038AHbna","title":"Человек-зверь","authorLine":"Эмиль Золя, В. 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